I guess it’s fitting that on a day so resonant in American history, I’m all giddy over soaps nodding to their history. Daniel and Chelsea on DAYS OF OUR LIVES may skeeve me out, but their union can be lauded this week, because of the hilarious conversation between Doug, Bo, Julie and Hope about how Bo and Hope’s relationship didn’t exactly warm the cockles of Doug’s heart. How funny was Bo trying to trump up excuses for why Daniel is bad for Chelsea and Doug countering with Daniel being adoctor as opposed to how Bo was just a shiftless no account? LOL! And, okay, I admit that Daniel and Chelsea were cute for a few seconds when they arrived at the Fourth of July bash together and Daniel got hauled off for a lecture by Victor. But I am NOT surrendering! Nuh-uh. I remain strong in my anti-Chan stance. (Y’all are giving me about two weeks before I cave, aren’t you?)

Flipping channels to CBS, I got a ginormous kick out of Tom and Margo’s 25th anniversary party on AS THE WORLD TURNS. It was just like watching a real family get-together, complete with bickering and that one relative that always gets inappropriately drunk (Hi, Chris!). When Lisa chided Casey for interrupting her already distracted toast with a “Quiet, Casey, or I’m gonna shoot you!” I fell out. Anyone else think that wasn’t just Lisa talking to Casey but Eileen Fulton talking to Billy Magnussen? The whole Hughes clan just has such a natural, believable vibe. Scott Holmes (Tom) and Ellen Dolan (Margo) really seem like a snarky married couple, and it’s a shame that new viewers like myself missed their heyday. Luckily, we got flashbacks! Yay! I’m a self-proclaimed flashback junkie. I can never get enough of them. And it was namecheck central, too! Cricket, John, Andy, Sabrina, Lien, all of Lisa’s husbands…I almost cried, I was so giddy.

The one sour note was that these beautiful scenes of family togetherness were juxtaposed with Paul wrapping up Sofie’s body and burying it. Was that reallynecessary? Are we really supposed to think Paul is a hero for covering up a pregnant girl’s murder? It’s despicable. Sofie may have become unhinged, but she was, at the core, a sweet girl and a loving mother. Dumping her in a hole like a dog burying a bone in the backyard was a terrible indignity.

Another show engaging in a terrible indignity this week…? GENERAL HOSPITAL, by having a war veteran attack two young women. Epic fail, guys. I would say more on the über-sore subject, but I’m saving my full Logan rant for print. Check out a future issue for my ire. Until then, Happy 4th of July!

originally posted on soapoperaweekly.com

I’ve been watching DAYS OF OUR LIVES every morning for the last two weeks, and I’m happy to report that the results are already visible: I’m happier, more cheerful, and generally ready to tackle the day. It’s like a cross between crack and brain bleach! The former because the hilarity of Nicole antagonizing just about everybody (and giving off major sparks with Philip) just sets me rolling … and the latter because after the past two weeks of “my” show, AS THE WORLD TURNS, I sorely need something to dissipate the steam building between my ears. 

See, I tend to get a little overinvolved in my soaps. Fortunately, this is seen as a plus in my current profession. Unfortunately, this means that my habits of yelling at the TV, squeeing over hunks and babies, and totally ’shipping my favorite couples has accompanied me to the office. When I’m “on the job,” interviewing and writing, I’m as evenhanded as I can possibly be. But when you plunk me in front of the TV (which is easy to do considering there’s one on my desk), I get tunnel vision. I get sucked in. I get passionate. And what am I most passionate about? The issue of diversity on soaps. Which means, yes, it’s ATWT’s Ameera who has me about to burst a blood vessel. 

I know a lot of viewers are furious about Ameera coming between Noah and Luke, but it’s a hallmark of every root-worthy couple on daytime that somebody is going to try and break them up somehow. Power to Nuke. It’s their turn. Unfortunately, it’s at Ameera’s expense. She’s a plot device who makes fellow noob Sofie look like a character who has been in Oakdale for decades. Ameera has no dreams, no motivation. She isn’t just played as foreign, she’s played as naive, and that’s ridiculous. I’m sorry, but any Muslim girl whose mother was liberal enough to befriend an American soldier isn’t going to act like some twit who just fell off the falafel truck and doesn’t understand when Noah says, “I like boys.” The sheer fact that Noah had to marry her to solve her immigration issues for her is so mind-boggling that I still haven’t stopped seeing red over it. Allah forbid anyone follow Holden’s sensible advice of hiring a lawyer. No, the Snyders must save the little foreign woman by wedding her to a strong, American man…whom she will, of course, fall in love with even if he’s gay! If that’s not staggeringly insensitive enough, then we have today, where Ameera kissed said American man. Come on, we all know she’s going to get shot down by Noah like he’s wielding an anti-aircraft missile. Is making her SO moony really necessary? Speaking of which, Casey got it with both barrels, too, considering that Ameera dashed his hopes rather cruelly. Why she would turn down a heterosexual cutie pie who was actually interested, I have no idea. 

I understand that ATWT is trying. I do get that. But it’s not enough when Islam is a religion that’s still a mystery to many Christian Americans and the war in Iraq is such a hot-button issue. Portraying this girl as a cross between moron and man-stealer does cultural understanding no favors. Similarly, actress Tala Ashe is done no favors. She is lovely and has a definite spark. She could do so much. ATWT could have made Ameera a good example of the immigrant experience; someone who could be a strong, positive role model for young girls growing up watching soaps and desperately wanting someone to connect with. Instead, the dialogue she has to spout rings hollow, and the spinelessness of Ameera must be Hell on her back. I hope Ashe has a good deal with a chiropractor. 

At least I have DAYS to numb the pain.

originally posted on soapoperaweekly.com