08.29.08
Soap Opera Weekly: Blogging With Mala
Did you know August is a Sweeps month? Me neither! But judging by the drama here at Digest/Weekly, it’s true! First we had a casting shocker, and yesterday we had a FIRE. I am not even kidding. I ran out to grab a late lunch yesterday afternoon and walked back to the office building only to spy flames shooting out of the roof. As it’s New York, there were people standing around gawking and going, “Hey, yo, that building’s on fire.” I, of course, was like, “That’s MY building!”
I called my colleague Julie up in the office, who was flabbergasted when I told her the roof was on fire. The alarms weren’t going off! I was like, “Dude, no, the roof’s on fire. Get everybody out.” Anyway, the gist of it is that, yes, the alarms kicked in, everyone from all the floors got out, the firemen came, and everything worked out. We were back in the office within an hour. But geez…talk about heart-stopping action!
Consequently, I’m wondering what else can happen before Sept. 1.
—There’s a blackout (entirely possible; it’s happened before.)
—Somebody gives birth in the elevator. (GH Editor Joe: “I don’t know nothin’ ’bout birthin’ no babies!”)
—A mysterious accented mercenary descends upon the offices and makes us all play silly games. (Spin the Bottle, Twister, etc.)
—Somebody pumps a mysterious gas through the vents, causing us all to hallucinate. (Frankly, I believe this happens already…)
—Our two Style editors get struck by lightning and sent to a time period where really ugly prints were “in.”
—A monkey escapes from the Madagascar exhibit at the Bronx Zoo and infects us all with a mysterious virus. (“Is there a monkey by the water cooler?” “No, but there IS one on top of the copier.”)
—Somebody gets hit on the head (probably me, because I’m a klutz) and sent to the afterlife to see beloved vets and learn some kind of life lesson.
I guess we shouldn’t be surprised that there’s big Sweeps stunts at a soap magazine, huh? I’m just waiting for a SOAPnet reality series set here!
originally posted on soapoperaweekly.com
08.27.08
Soap Opera Weekly: Blogging With Mala
It’s been a crazy few days, so I forgot to set a tape for NIGHT SHIFT. I know, I know. I’m ashamed of myself. I watched two episodes of EUREKA and the second season premiere of GREEK on ABC Family and went straight to bed. So, imagine my disappointment when I awoke this morning and realized I had no NS to indulge in! I’ll have to pilfer a tape from a colleague at some point or wait till the Sunday replay.
Still, let’s not let a little thing like missing an episode keep me from speculating. Here’s what I think I missed: 1)Gay Kyle and Not Izzie were overwhelmed by one thing or another and sat on the Gurney of Angst. 2)NapoLEOn noticed Jagger and Saira are spending time together and got huffy. Jagger probably flashed that dimpled smile that so eloquently telegraphs “Wow, you are a tool.” 3)This week on ALL MY BABY BUMPS, Robin probably looked like she was a little bloated from PMS. 4)Robert did something awesome, because that’s just how he rolls. 5)Somebody was half-naked. 6)Epiphany got in someone’s business.
I will check back in after I’ve seen the episode to gauge how on point my guesses were, or feel free to tell me in the comments.
Now to GREEK for a moment. It’s a show I hooked several coworkers on, and one I’d gladly recommend to anyone else. Don’t let the whole frat boy/sorority girl thing fool you; it’s a wonderful, witty, show with a great cast. I’m not sure what ABC Family is doing pairing it with THE SECRET LIFE OF WALTER MITTY er, THE AMERICAN TEENAGER, which seems like a much more dour 7TH HEAVEN-ish series. GREEK pushes the boundaries. I mean, hey, just last night, we got to see a bunch of guys in cheerleader skirts! (My hats off to you, Beaver, for doing the splits.) It’s not too late to Rush and join the audience of this gem of a show.
originally posted on soapoperaweekly.com
08.25.08
Common threads: girl power, Dor and Fire.
I finally got around to seeing writer/director Nagesh Kukunoor’s acclaimed 2006 film Dor, and while I’m not familiar with Kukonoor’s other works (Iqbal, Hydrabad Blues), this is one movie I won’t soon forget. Stunning visuals of Rajesthan and Himachal Pradesh set the backdrop for two equally stunning and unique female characters, Meera (Ayesha Takia), and Zeenat (Gul Panag). There are all kinds of pithy phrases to sum up this movie, deeming it a story about the struggle of women, about life in a patriarchal world, etc. But at the end of the day, all I can think to sum it up is, “I liked it better than Fire. It was a more effective lesbian film than Fire.”
And I know what people who have seen Dor are thinking: “Wait, Mala, it’s not a lesbian film!” Well, no. You’re right. It’s textually heterosexual, while at the same time being incredibly girl positive. When I say it’s more effective than Fire, it’s because Deepa Mehta’s 1996 film, to me, suffered from being a little too Western. Eastern sex and sensuality is an ill fit with English terminology. English is guttural, harsh, and Fire, in many ways, is a guttural, harsh film. Even years after I’ve seen it, my main impression is of how it gave me the willies to watch it, not what an iconic film it was. It’s dark, oppressive, showing us the narrow world Radha (Shabana Azmi) and Sita (Nandita Das) live in and how fire must literally light their way to freedom. Dor is a film that trades in air. Wide open skies, expansive sands, and Zeenat, who takes life into herself in great, determined, gulps. And yet its storytelling is quiet, sensitive, tended to with affection and humor and grace. There are things you can say in Hindi that sound beautiful, lyrical, and would sound idiotic in English. There are things that don’t translate. But there are also things that do, like the basic themes in Dor. These are two women who love each other and strip each other bare emotionally because of their common experience. And, to me, that was more breathtaking than watching Radha and Sita make love.
Dor, which literally translates to thread, is a film all about connections. The ties that bind. Marriage, duty, friendship, passion, devotion. Zeenat loves her husband enough to set across the country to save his life. Meera loves hers enough to try and sacrifice joy because she thinks that’s what would honor him — and, oh, Ayesha Takia, a “Bollywood babe,” is just a revelation here, with Meera’s child-like nature and the way she dances with abandon when she lets her guard down. She took my breath away, while Gul Panag’s kohl-lined eyes seemed to see straight into my soul. But I would be remiss if I didn’t mention a third thread, perhaps the film’s most colorful: Shreyas Talpade’s (Om Shanti Om) whimsical Behroopiya. A nameless vagabond, simply referred to by his profession, “actor,” these wearer of many costumes and many faces turns out to be one of the film’s most genuine characters.
There’s a turning point in the movie, where all three of them run into the sand and take a moment out of time. It’s a “fake” Bollywood number, where they just let go and lip sync, and their faces are filled with such light. “Kajra Re” from Dhoom plays over the scenes, and part of me felt that it should have been “Chudiya Khanak Gayeen” from Lamhe but then I remembered that it’s a bit before Meera and Zeenat’s time. For me, that sequence encapsulated Dor, encapsulated women in India… searching for the precious freedom to dance like no one’s watching. It’s not about burning, not about being tested by fire. It’s about rhythm, about motion, about breathing in and breathing out.
(Make your own Waiting to Exhale joke here.)
With its subtle, sensitive story, beautiful cinematography, and gorgeous characters, Dor, as a film, is a delicate, fine piece of silk and a bright red dupatta all at once.
08.22.08
Soap Opera Weekly: Blogging With Mala
So I’ve already loosed my venom on B&B’s poor Katie Logan. Now that I’ve gotten all that bile out of my system I’m actually at a very zen place with Katie. I don’t mind her anymore. Clearly it’s time I cleansed some more and came to terms with a few other characters who drive me nuts. Oddly enough, the topic of today’s spewage is also a Katie … GH’s Kate Howard. Now, when it occurred to me that #2 on my soap opera dart board had the same moniker as #1, I started wondering if I had deep-seeded Kate Issues. There was a girl in high school named Kate who was really mean to me. Maybe I’m just lashing out at poor, unsuspecting Kates and Katies because of that? Except that theory doesn’t hold water. I like all the other Kates I know. DAYS’ Kate Roberts, my boss’ cute daughter, Kate Hudson … oh, wait, there’s Katie “Kate Cruise” Holmes, but I don’t think that counts.
Where was I?
Ah, yes, Kate Howard! So, I don’t like Kate, and it’s not a consistent, festering hate. Sometimes she doesn’t bug me at all. She and Sonny are off in their little bubble and more power to ‘em! I’m not invested in the couple, but if they stay together I have a better chance of seeing Carly and Jax survive into 2009. My dislike of Kate usually pops up in the context of her Big Dramatic Identity Secret. It sets my teeth on edge that she Anglicized her name from Connie Falconeri in order to succeed in the fashion industry. That is the most absurd thing I’ve ever heard. This point has been made a thousand times by our magazine, by bloggers, etc. Italian people are pretty much synonymous with fashion. You’d think Ms. Falconeri would have no problems! But, unfortunately, the Italian name goes along with Kate’s embarrassment with her Brooklyn upbringing. There’s a dozen reasons you can tell GH is put together in California (like Max and Diane rooting for the Dodgers! SACRILEGE!) but the biggest, most glaring ones, come from Kate’s storyline. No real New Yorker is ever ashamed of coming from Brooklyn. It’s a badge of honor. (Tangential shout-out to GOSSIP GIRL: Williamsburg is not the wrong side of the tracks.) I’m not from New York originally, but two of my close friends are, and watching them whip out the Brooklyn cred is awesome.
Then, there’s how Kate runs Crimson. She’s a demanding, condescending boss with a STAFF OF THREE. How do you put out a glossy mag like Crimson with Clarice and two crazy assistants who are never in the office? Kate’s this super famous editor that apparently has one heck of a rep…and she doesn’t do anything except bark orders at people and name-drop. Though she does have meetings that Sonny interrupts, and there’s apparently fashion designers involved and mannequins with designer dresses on them. But let’s not forget that she thinks having a fake affair with married Jax sells issues. What?! That’s not a “woman who can have it all,” Kate. That’s a dirty tramp. If what a magazine staff does on their own time made the issues fly off the shelves, every one of us at WEEKLY would be squiring some handsome lad about on our arms for the paparazzi. (Although, I’m willing to do that if anyone wants to volunteer…)
I like Kate the best when her guard is down, when she lets Connie peek through and Megan Ward does that completely over the top, nasal accent. That’s charming. That’s something to connect to. This character has so much potential to be a good one. To be more than a collection of false images of New York and icky messages about denying who you are to get ahead. Kate’s a working woman, confident and successful. Can’t she be those things without being insufferable? What is GH trying to say about competent women with ambition?
originally posted on soapoperaweekly.com
Unreal estates: apartment hunting in NYC
Apartment hunting in New York City sucks. It really does. I find the whole process baffling, not to mention financially strapping. How in the world have real estate prices gone so high that people here expect you to shell out $1700 for a studio apartment and probably pay a 15% broker fee to boot? It’s highway robbery!
My lease is up at the end of September and I’m practically developing an ulcer looking for a new place. Nothing really opens up for the month of one’s move until the month of one’s move. Nobody calls or writes back when you answer ads at Craigslist or Backpage, and half of the ads are fake anyway. Ideally, I’d love to stay in the city, but I just can’t afford it anymore. I’d rather spend money on food and the movies and nights out with the gals. So, I’ve turned my eyes to Queens, my old neighborhood, where I lived when I first came to New York. And I’m floored, because in just a handful of years, the rent there has skyrocketed. I took a look at a studio that was just gut renovated and it was $1375. $1375 for a studio in Sunnyside. That’s ridiculous. But the broker didn’t blink an eye, insisting you can’t get a one bedroom for that price anymore.
Really?
I knew Astoria got all hip (What is it, the new Williamsburg?), but did the taint have to spread to Sunnyside and Woodside? Wah. Stop it. Go away, people!
As if my search for a home hasn’t been woeful enough, there’s the constant debate over staying in Manhattan, and reminders of why staying in here is just no good for me. Like, last night, a group of people were woo-hoo-ing and yelling at 4 AM, presumably after the bars closed. Oh my God. They were SO loud they might as well have been standing at the foot of my bed. I’d take the rattle of the 7 train over that any day. There’s also the cost. Rent is ridiculous, grocery prices are high, and I can’t really DO anything as long as my entire income is funneling in that direction. On the other hand, I’m really close to work, and moving to Queens means commuting again. I hate the train! I’ll have to take it in every weekend to hang out and meet friends.
Of course, if I don’t find an apartment in either place, it’s a moot point. I’ll be sleeping on the sidewalk with Hobo Bob…who probably charges a %15 sidewalk user fee.
08.20.08
Soap Opera Weekly: Blogging With Mala
Help! I don’t know what’s happening, but it appears that my fondness for NIGHT SHIFT’s Claire (see, I’m even using her name) is growing in direct proportion to how much my interest with the rest of the show is waning. The pacing for this week was SO slow. I only cracked a smile a few times, like when Patrick and Jagger had an über-awkward conversation at the beginning of the episode, and when Epiphany called a pestering Claire “Miss CSI Flower Unit.” Oh, and when Leo reached up and tousled his “little brother” Kyle’s hair in the locker room. Aw! I did love Epiphany and Robert’s heart-to-heart about their kids and Kyle talking to Patrick about wanting a family someday, but the rest of the time, my mind wandered. I don’t want to be bummed about this show. Stop it!
On the plus side, GH: DAY SHIFT drew me in for about 2. 5 seconds yesterday with angry Nikolas hauling Nadine against him to kiss her…and then lost me again when he proceeded to do his impression of a face-hugger from Aliens. Ick.
Luckily, I’m still enamored of ATWT, especially with their peapacking (to peapack: verb; to film one’s show outside, a la GUIDING LIGHT, in Peapack, N.J.). The outdoor scenes on the Snyder farm development site and out by the barn and pond are the perfect balance to their indoor shots… even if, sometimes, they can’t keep track of evening at Metro and afternoon outside. Oops! Plus, I have to give Marie Wilson (Meg) and Kelley Menighan Hensley (Emily) massive props for navigating that terrain in heels. I can’t even walk on a sidewalk in flats without tripping.
originally posted on soapoperaweekly.com
08.16.08
Every once in a while I experience a culinary triumph.
I’m happy to say that I have graduated from the “Pasta ala Mala” school of throwing together Ragu sauces and Starkist tuna and actually delved into being a little more desi in my cooking attempts. This came about because I had a bunch of jasmine rice in the cabinet from when my mom visited last year and a package of frozen vegetables when she visited a few months ago. I’ve been perfecting the recipe for a while and I think I’ve finally got it down.
Mind you, this recipe is just a guideline. I like to think that it’s impossible for Indian home cooking to involve exact numbers. We’re very much a school of “just throw stuff in, and then throw MORE stuff in.” So, no matter what the amounts for the spices are below, just assume I kept randomly adding in more at various points in the process. LOL.
Mala’s Technicolor Dreamrice
Supplies:
A ten inch diameter nonstick frying pan.
A nonstick hatha (what the Hell is the English word for ‘cooking spoon’?)
Ingredients:
1/2 cup uncooked white rice (long grain, jasmine or basmati)
1 10 oz package frozen peas & carrots
1 tablespoon vegetable oil
1/4 teaspoon turmeric
3/4 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon ginger
1/2 teaspoon onion powder
1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
1/4 teaspoon of whole black peppercorns
desired amount of dried cranberries
desired amount of unsalted, dry roasted peanuts
Directions:
After a thorough rinse, soak rice in lukewarm water for ten minutes. While rice is soaking, heat oil in frying pan at medium heat. When the oil is hot enough, unwrap the frozen vegetables and jump back three feet to avoid being splattered. Let the veggies thaw, stirring occasionally to break apart the ice and ensure it cooks evenly. Add the turmeric and a 1/4 teaspoon of salt. (Make sure you don’t add too much turmeric. It’s solely for color and tastes very bitter.) Sautee! Once your veggies stop looking all frozen-y and raw and actually seem to be browning, drain your rice and dump it into the frying pan. Add two parts water to how much ever rice you have and turn up the heat a little. Add the remainder of your spices and bring to a boil.
Once the rice comes to a boil, reduce the temperature to a simmer and cook until all the water is absorbed. (If you’re like me and you taste as you go, you end up adding more ginger, more salt, etc.) Add peanuts and cranberries and stir until thoroughly mixed.
Voila!
Mala's Technicolor Dreamrice
I usually end up with enough for three meals. I pair it with George Foreman-ed chicken or steak (not very Indian of me, I know!) or eat it all by itself.
Prep time: 20 minutes max!
08.15.08
Soap Opera Weekly: Blogging With Mala
Today, let’s check in with AS THE WORLD TURNS. Remember my Poor Defenseless Friend from my July 24 Todd and Marty post? The other night, I totally talked ATWT at her. Fortunately, she used to watch it back in the day so she wasn’t completely lost.
Me: I’m watching Chris and Alison videos on YouTube. Help!
PDF: Good or bad?
Me: I don’t know, but I think I became a ‘Cali’ fan when I wasn’t looking. They’ve set up a really great dynamic with Alison, Aaron, and Chris. Aaron loves her sweetly. Chris is more dangerous.
PDF: Remind me whose kid he is?
Me: Aaron is Holden’s son, Chris is Dr. Bob Hughes’ youngest, and Alison is Emily Stewart’s sister.
PDF: I was probably watching ATWT when Chris was born.
Me: Chris has actually been a grownup for a while. More likely Aaron and Ali.
PDF: No, my mom watched when I was growing up. [Wikipedia] says Chris was born in the ’80s. I have vague memories of Kim and Bob being on a boat. And Bob’s affair with Susan.
Me: Ooh. Those were good times.
PDF: Alison’s mom and Chris’s dad had an affair!
Me: Yeah! Kim and Susan had the BEST fight about it a few months ago.
PDF: Seriously? Susan and Bob hooked up like 20 years ago.
Me: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i272k0-My-A
Me: It was because Ali was suing Chris for sexual harassment. It dredged up the old angst.
PDF: Kim has always been kick-ass. Why did Alison sue Chris?
Me: He was helping her with nursing school while they were dating. She wasn’t ready to have sex, kept getting so close and then freaking out. He got frustrated and yelled at her. She ran off and cried to Aaron. Chris assumed they slept together and had her kicked out of school (she was failing anyhow, so he’d been using his influence to help her stay in).
PDF: Okay…
Me: It made the Hughes and Stewarts all crabby at each other again. Plus Emily and Casey were having a secret affair! It’s been a great summer for the families.
PDF: ATWT was at its best when it was about those core families…the Hugheses, the Snyders.
Me: I totally agree!
PDF: Isn’t Emily like twice Casey’s age?
Me: Yup!
PDF: Ew.
Me: I can’t wait till Dusty comes back.
PDF: Someone on your message boards mentioned CarJack as being a bigger couple than even Lily and Holden. True/false?
Me: These days? I think I’d say true.
PDF: To me, Lily and Holden are iconic. Huh. Weird. But I haven’t watched in a long time.
Me: They are absolutely iconic, but Carjack has definitely become huge. They’re ATWT’s “It” couple. Well, that is, if the show would quit breaking them up. They haven’t actually been together in a while.
PDF: I like that Kim and Bob have been together for the majority of my life.
Me: Me, too!
PDF: Statistically SOMEONE has to stay together.
Me: Ditto for Tom and Margo, aside from a few aberrations.
PDF: Part of my problem is that when I actually did watch ATWT, I didn’t LIKE Carly.
Me: Well, she’s not the nicest person person in the world. Or ON the WORLD. Heh.
PDF: Okay, glad it’s not just me.
Me: It’s funny, because I actually like Emily. Probably because she’s such a mess. Her sense of humor cracks me up.
PDF: Emily was often…broken. But I guess she was a more well-rounded bitch than Carly. I can appreciate a good bitch. Lucinda is no saint, but she’s still awesome.
Me: Lucinda rocks my socks! She’s fabulous.
PDF: I guess I’m just old school.
Me: Me, too!
PDF: She and Craig were always fascinating. I’m so OLD.
Me: You and me both, Babe.
originally posted on soapoperaweekly.com
08.13.08
Soap Opera Weekly: Blogging With Mala
Okay. Uncle, uncle! I give, I give. Leo’s a jerk. Last night’s NIGHT SHIFT opened with him being so crass to Saira about their locker room hookup that I can’t keep defending the guy, no matter how much chemistry they have. Waving her bra at her? What are we, in high school? As someone said to me the other day, “I don’t like nuLeo; he’s angry and he’s short.” “Maybe he’s angry BECAUSE he’s short?” I cracked. I mean, Napoleon complex much? All kidding aside, it goes back to my thing about the show trying to emulate the early Patrick/Robin dynamic. There are two problems with that: we already have a Patrick and Robin, and Patrick wasn’t written so clunky. I can’t speak for anyone else, but even when he was an arrogant cad I liked the guy.
Moving on, this week on “All My Baby Bumps,” Robin once again looked like she had one too many Twinkies … while on GH, she was getting her ultrasound and looked about ready to give birth to Brangelina-style twins. (As an aside: Massive kudos to NS for spoiling that she’s having a girl a whole week early.)
You know what NS is beginning to feel like? A very young writer who doesn’t quite have the grammar or the spelling down but has that gorgeous nugget of storytelling potential that tells you in 5-10 years they’ll be an amazing novelist. The Robert and Patrick scenes, for instance, were gold. “I didn’t do it on purpose!” defended Patrick of knocking Robin up. LOL! Then, the silly argument about the French-speaking patient where Robin dubbed her guy a “domestic manwhore!” and put-upon Patrick yelped that he didn’t have syphilis? It’s moments like that where NS excels.
I guess I shouldn’t be surprised: working with characters that already exist is easy. You stick to canon and you can’t go wrong! Writing ones of your own (and I do think NS is treating Leo like a brand-new character) is much harder. Raise your hand if you have the Great American Novel gathering dust on your hard drive. It’s difficult to get that sucker finished, isn’t it?
But to end on a more positive note, I think Not Izzie is growing on me, and I still heart Kyle. Props to Adam Grimes for playing the ridiculous senior citizens-with-syph story — and taking on the homophobic soda machine — with aplomb!
originally posted on soapoperaweekly.com
08.06.08
Soap Opera Weekly: Blogging With Mala
True confession time: B&B’s Katie Logan drives me absolutely crazy. Up the wall, back down, and across the street to pick up some Valium. That’s not to say I hate Heather Tom. She’s fantastic and she completely rocked the scenes on the Marlin where Katie told Nick she’s expecting their bundle of adulterous joy. But Katie herself…? Oh, man. Has there ever been a character more undeserving of the worship every single other character in town bestows on her? You’d think Katie found the cure for AIDS, solved World Hunger, and invented Botox. But no, even theForresters, who hate anybody named Logan, adore her simply because she breathes.
Please. It was bad enough that we had to sit through the whole “Boo-hoo, I have Storm’s heart!” debacle, now Katie is a cheating, pregnant liar who shared one night of passion with her niece’s man. (Side note: How good could THAT have been, what with her being near death and all?)
I know viewers were probably supposed to feel sorry for Katie as she cited her selfishness and talked about how she brings misery to everything she touches, but I sure didn’t. “Storm died so I could live, and this just proves that the wrong person died that day,” she bemoaned. I cheered, going, “Yes, you’re right!” Considering how everyone from Brooke to Bridget keeps calling her a “walking miracle,” and talking about how wonderful she is, it’s nice to see someone doesn’t think she’s all that and a bag of heart-healthy chips. Too bad it all comes off as martyrous whining rather than self-awareness.
Then, Katie went off to brood at the railing of the boat. “Why do you hate me?” she wailed at God. “Oh, let me count the ways,” I said to my TV. There was suddenly fog so thick that I thought the Black Pearl was about to dock and belch forth Geoffrey Rush. Only it didn’t. Instead, we got naked Storm. (Nice to know hair growth occurs in Limbo or Purgatory or wherever he’s been.) Naked Storm enticed “woe is me and my cursed fetus!” Katie to jump. Guess what? So did I! And then she did! But the show got my hopes up and then dashed them cruelly. Whyyyyy? Why, B&B? I was so close to never having to put up with Our Lady of the Transplanted Heart again, but it turned out to only be a dream. A dream that helped Katie accept her miracle baby and led to Nick making googly eyes at her. Gag.
The last, fleeting hope I have is for Bridget to kick her auntie’s butt when she finds out about Nick and the Catalina Kid. I want a reveal that makes burning Deacon’s clothes in the trashcan look like a weenie roast in comparison. Heck, she needs to start one of those infamous California brush fires with the heat of her fury. With any luck, Katie can tie herself to a stake and go all Saint Joan.
Ahem.
Anybody have that Valium handy?
originally posted on soapoperaweekly.com
